The hardest thing when moving is starting somewhere. I was lucky; I came into Canada and found a group of friends ready for me. My brothers’ friends have made all the difference once I started moving in and trying to make myself adjust to the new life I was about to build. Yet despite that, I felt I had to develop my own circle of friends. I became a volunteer in an organization advocating for peace in the Middle East, enrolled myself in daily classes in a French school, committed to a gym membership, didn’t miss an interview opportunity, and allowed myself to run conversations with new people, strangers at the time.
Apart from missing my lifestyle and friends back home, I missed home itself. And what I mean by that is, my own home: my house, my family, my car, my bed sheets. My family foremost. Friends could become a figure of family, and with time, God has developed for me a big family for me in Canada, bigger than I had expected.
On the first two days of attending French class, my instructor realized that the level I was placed in didn’t meet my existing language standards. So she took me up to a higher level the next day and there I was, like a new kid on the block struck with new faces, and almost all were of the same age group. They were friendly, but one lovely Lebanese lady named Mona stood out amongst them. Interested, she asked me questions about myself and as days passed by, a strong connection between us only got stronger. We easily bonded and quickly clicked, both spoke out loudly during class, and our classmates and teacher admired the humor released every few minutes, like the timed ringing of the bell for recess we hear every day and the national anthem we must rise for and respect every morning. Since then, our relationship took shape as a mother-daughter relationship and the love only grew as she took me under her wings.
Through a friend of mine who works in an immigration employment center I applied to a volunteer job. During the mentoring day, a rather late woman, Lama, joined the introductory session. We never spoke to one another, and yet we both knew we were Arab.
On my first day at the French school, we ran into each other on a sunny morning of a chilly day. We briefly said hello and a few days later, both were surprised that we would eventually be in the same class together. For some reason, I didn’t feel we would get along, but only time and circumstances proved me wrong. But our relationship didn’t develop until later on.
The class decided to arrange for an outing and have lunch together and during our shared meals, Lama invited certain people over to her new home. I was one of them. I arrived late to the gathering that day at her house, but nothing could describe the astonishment the moment I stepped foot into her place. I was greeted with a Hawaiaan ribbon of flowers by her young daughter and surrounded by a group of ladies that had welcomed me just as warmly as Lama and her daughter, Joud, did. Tears of joy just crawled down my cheeks. After munching and socializing, in a matter of moments, a birthday cake was strolled in and a chorus sang me Happy Birthday. I don’t know really how to explain the way I felt. I was surprised, I was delighted and I didn’t know how to show gratitude for this gesture. It was like giving me a big warm hug and finding comfort just at that. Although I had already celebrated my birthday twice; the first by imposing myself at my friend’s house to bake myself a cake because my oven wasn't working, then suddenly it converted into a party, with several cakes baked, snacks, gifts, banners and balloons of Happy Birthday Princess spread around the room. I was in bliss amongst the people I loved and who cared to make an effort on a short notice to come and attend. The second celebration was with the French class. I had baked a cake and shared it with my classmates, but suddenly we all had to hide beneath the desks to practice an emergency drill, in case of a burglary incident. But still, it wasn’t all that bad-after all what mattered most was the sharing with people who were good to me and whom I had seen every day for a while.
Three birthday celebrations and the one that had a bigger impact on me was the third one. This is when my family started. Mona and Lama had arranged for this to happen and God had arranged that this was how the three of us would become a family-which we all needed and all deserved. Except it wasn’t just the three of us. Both Mona and Lama have two children, a boy and a girl. Of course the boys are preoccupied and finding family didn’t matter much to them as much as us three. Joud, Lama’s daughter and Heba, Mona’s daughter, were part of the family. Each came in at different times, but we had formed a family already and they were already part of it. Mona, the mother, Lama, the older sister, Heba, the younger sister and Joud, the baby angel of the family. For the first time, I am not the youngest of the family, and for the first time, there was a very strong women presence in my life. I have grown up with four men, including my father, and my mother and I were the only women. I had grown up knowing it’s a man’s world. In Canada, I finally knew that there was a women’s world too, and no man’s world could exist without the presence of women. We vent, we dine, we cook and bake, we joke, we cry, we yell, we face the bad moments together, we share the best news to each other first, we celebrate, we do all the things a family does, and maybe more, including a holy ritual of gathering together around a homemade dinner table on Fridays. We care not about time, money or matter- we care for one another. Mona gets mad at me when I don’t send her a text message pampering her, Lama never stops sharing with me jokes cracking me up at any moment and time and is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS there for me, Joud is a source of love that I never experienced before, because I never had a younger sibling. She is a generous waterfall of innocence and spice. Heba is the calmest of us all. As we all yell and scream at each other’s faces to make one another heard as we stand centimeters apart, she is the peacemaker between us. We all worry about one another and we all rush for one another, and the one thing that doesn’t make us worry anymore, is that we have each other. You may have wondered where I have been all this time away from my blog; I have been living, enjoying and strengthening my family. Their love to me is irreplaceable and never ending. I am certain this is a family, although unrelated through blood, will always be part of me, and not only my life.
Three birthday celebrations and the one that had a bigger impact on me was the third one. This is when my family started. Mona and Lama had arranged for this to happen and God had arranged that this was how the three of us would become a family-which we all needed and all deserved. Except it wasn’t just the three of us. Both Mona and Lama have two children, a boy and a girl. Of course the boys are preoccupied and finding family didn’t matter much to them as much as us three. Joud, Lama’s daughter and Heba, Mona’s daughter, were part of the family. Each came in at different times, but we had formed a family already and they were already part of it. Mona, the mother, Lama, the older sister, Heba, the younger sister and Joud, the baby angel of the family. For the first time, I am not the youngest of the family, and for the first time, there was a very strong women presence in my life. I have grown up with four men, including my father, and my mother and I were the only women. I had grown up knowing it’s a man’s world. In Canada, I finally knew that there was a women’s world too, and no man’s world could exist without the presence of women. We vent, we dine, we cook and bake, we joke, we cry, we yell, we face the bad moments together, we share the best news to each other first, we celebrate, we do all the things a family does, and maybe more, including a holy ritual of gathering together around a homemade dinner table on Fridays. We care not about time, money or matter- we care for one another. Mona gets mad at me when I don’t send her a text message pampering her, Lama never stops sharing with me jokes cracking me up at any moment and time and is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS there for me, Joud is a source of love that I never experienced before, because I never had a younger sibling. She is a generous waterfall of innocence and spice. Heba is the calmest of us all. As we all yell and scream at each other’s faces to make one another heard as we stand centimeters apart, she is the peacemaker between us. We all worry about one another and we all rush for one another, and the one thing that doesn’t make us worry anymore, is that we have each other. You may have wondered where I have been all this time away from my blog; I have been living, enjoying and strengthening my family. Their love to me is irreplaceable and never ending. I am certain this is a family, although unrelated through blood, will always be part of me, and not only my life.
Five generations of love and warmth, homes with wide-open doors welcoming me without even knocking, relations without any complexities, complications or sensitivities, hearts who know nothing but generosity passed on to me and to one another by Mona, Lama, Heba and Joud. I genuinely love you all and I am truly blessed, truly. I always count you all more than once when I count my blessings, and I don’t know how I could be more grateful to God for being so generous for allowing me to share the purity of your hearts and pivotal presence in my life.
