Ron

A lot happened recently. I have a family in my new home country. I have made new friends who are hundreds of miles away and have received treats because they care in making me happy. I reconnected with people I thought I wouldn’t get along with. I have started a part time job. I thought of moving to Montreal and ended up deciding to stay where I am for various reasons. The cold is kicking in and my few extra pounds keeps me comfortably warm. Yet I fight with myself every day, seeking for more. I still feel many pieces of me are missing and that I am incomplete. I feel that I am someone somewhere, no one everywhere, and everyone nowhere.

The best times of our lives are always when we are younger. No one really judged our judgments and barely anyone cares about what and who you are. In my school, it kind of mattered. It was a big school with a big student body coming from different backgrounds, races, religions, political views and nationalities. Within each class there were always differences and groups of cliques; the popular vs. the unpopular, the geeks vs. the smart and trendy, the hot vs. the gutsy and the rest were wanderers- who didn’t fit in any and or in all. The beauty of it all was that we all knew each other and ran into having classes together. As we all parted ways and set off to our new ventures in life  awaiting us, we thought we didn’t care and wouldn’t care about most of the people that we once knew. Thanks to social networking, most of us are now all connected. The same cliques exist on Facebook, except it is virtual and invisible at the same time. Those who didn’t have any strength to say anything, now find themselves opinionated and voicing their thoughts and beliefs advocated all they want. Being judged on Facebook is nothing like being picked on in school. On Facebook we have more choices, freedom, and no one can beat us up for speaking to the loser or evaluate how bold we are for making efforts to communicate with some overly-rated popular person. I think we are more ourselves in the virtual world than we are on ground; it has its good sides and its bad sides, but after all, this isn’t an essay to elaborate more than the stated.

It all started when I myself was voicing myself  about certain issues occurring and shared whatever I felt regarding my ongoing and changing circumstances. Ron commented on a few remarks I made and we seemed to ‘challenge’ each other, in efforts to persuade one another with our opposing opinions. With respect we replied to one another until one day I mentioned that I have writers’ block. His curiosity led him to ask me why I have one and for what reason I am writing. I sent him my blog’s link and that marked the establishment of our friendship, although virtual, but yet a very true one.

Back in our school days, Ron and I barely exchanged saying good morning to one another. Each one of us had their own group of friends and like in all schools, not all groups mingle with one another. I cannot really recall what our groups would be classified as, but my friends were by all means not part of the “it” group and Ron’s friends were probably classified as the ‘cool’ group because they mingled with others, maybe minimally, but they were most likely to be present at most events that other groups planned during weekends. In simpler words, I was quite and shy, he was adventurous, out there, and experimental. At that time, we didn’t meet at a common point, except in band class.

So here we are in 2011, 10 years or more after being together in one school and absolutely no communication has taken place, or even thoughts of ever communicating once again, a friendship starts between two classmates back in Middle School. Personally, I never thought that Ron would ever have such a great heart. Everyone does have beauty of some sort and goodness in them someway, but Ron’s qualities of kindness and support have surpassed my anticipations.

Once we started writing to one another on Facebook and got to know each other more during our correspondence, all Ron cared about is caring about me, my happiness, my comfort and being there for me as much as he could. He wanted me to vent and air it all out. And he allowed me to be who I am and find ease wearing and exposing my own skin. I must say, he is  a good listener and a great shoulder to cry on. Once he would hear me dwelling, he would instantly and continuously try to cheer me up. He would send jokes, comics, try to inspire me to writing back on my blog. His ‘intervention’ which I allowed brought me happiness in the sense that made me grateful and more of a believer. Good things happen to good people and if you do good things, your payback will be in the form of good things. We just have to see it correctly and from the right perspective. I thought to myself, although he lives all the way in Tennessee and despite how we barely ever spoke in school, God’s way of rewarding me for some of the good things I have done in my life was through Ron’s friendship. When we started talking I was a wreck; everything in my life was going wrong and many challenges visited me on a daily basis. Ron’s friendship brought me a smile while walking to work, brought me hope before going to bed and made me excited when I start up my laptop first thing in the morning. Words of support, thoughts of kindness and gestures of care were what I  continuously received from him.

He decided to cheer me up even more. He surprised me with delivering a package of homemade fudge from his hometown. I couldn’t believe that a friend would go that far to making someone happy. I couldn’t believe that I might have meant that much to someone. I was ecstatic. Apart from the fact that Fedex troubled both of us until I got it-leading to the fact that I had to make the trip myself to pick it up; it was definitely worth the while. I had forgotten what it means to unwrap a gift (although knowing what it contains), I had forgotten what it felt to receive anything from anyone. All I knew at the time was that I was smiling happily carrying that Fedex box around. My brother and his girlfriend were really curious  about what was inside and who would have been so nice to make my day. We sat in a coffee shop, made our orders, and they were curious as a cat regarding the box’s elements. I rushed and carefully unwrapped the box and they started to expect that it was something to eat. The excitement was killing all of us; I lifted the box’s cover and there we had a boxful of fudge divided almost evenly into four. Ron specifically sent my preferences: dark chocolate, peanut butter, almonds and chocolate chips. We all stared at the bulks of chocolate, deep in taste, rich in flavor, and beautiful with their fillings. The three of us didn’t know how we would enjoy eating and yet feel so guilty digging into each quarter of the heavenly fudge sent all the way from Tennessee. Truly, one of the best surprises I have enjoyed, although knowing they would go straight to my thighs, abdominals and finally land onto my hips.

After spending dozens of minutes indulging soft bites of fudge, I told Ron that as much as I appreciated him and his thoughts, I don’t know how I would forgive him for the added calories reaching every tip of my body. Needless to say that he never got the end of my complaints about my body from that moment onwards. He just believed I should be happy and wanted to me to find comfort with myself even with enjoying a few guilt trips here and there. I finally understood what he meant and of course our friendship continued.

When all of hell’s devils came running to my doors, Ron found himself struggling to make me smile simply because I was too negative at the time. He felt frustrated, so suddenly he thought of sending me something. He promised to support me in my diet, he promised to not send me fudge again, and he promised he would always be there for me. Ron actually taught me something after the second delivery- when there is a will there is a way, and maybe more than one way. I had waited all my life to witness the actions of someone who really reached out to the extreme limits to make things possible; something I always believed in.  Ron managed to keep his promises; almost all of them. The second time he delivered me something to cheer me up was a fruit arrangement from Edible Arrangements, famous for assembling fruits in the form of a bouquet; finely cut pineapples, cantaloupes, seedless grapes, and blushing red strawberries all gorgeously arranged in a pumpkin pot. I looked for the address he had given me and I was really just thinking it might be a book to pick up; I hesitated once I saw the store. I was sure it was suite #100 but what I wasn’t sure about was that it was an Edible Arrangements store. It was almost impossible for me to believe that he would send me something from there. All I knew was that I loved Edible Arrangements and I had no clue how he knew that too. But he didn’t- he wanted to cheer me up with something that’s healthy, and not the immensely caloric fudge. I stepped through the store and I kept on telling the sales girl, “No, no, no, no, that’s not for me. Are you sure? I can’t believe this.” I placed my ‘just bought hot’ Starbucks cup of peppermint coffee on the counter and did what the lady asked me to (sign here, etc). I carried the biggest arrangement of fruits I ever received and walked out the door, forgetting my non-sipped coffee and stood in the middle of the street, as though lost in direction. But I really was lost in delight, surprise, and pride. I really didn’t believe I could be worth such a thoughtful gesture. I really didn’t believe that a virtual and very real friendship would make me feel so worthy. As tears were coming down my face as if watering the fresh arrangement of fruits, it took me minutes to figure out what I could do and which direction I should walk back home.

It seemed that all of Ottawa were happy for me too. I brushed through Ottawa’s streets proud and yet shy. I was charmed with delighting remarks, all directed of course to Ron’s delivery. Everyone, young and old, men and women, all added more bliss to the moment I held as I found my way home. Ron didn’t just make me happy, he managed to make everyone else around me happy. And of course I wouldn’t be surprised if Edible Arrangements made more sales and witnessed more profit after my 30 minute cat walk, carrying their brand name and showing off their product, tightly embraced in my arms, through the city's main streets. I don’t think Ottawa's residents ever knew Edible Arrangements ever existed until after that day. Both myself and Edible Arrangements would like to say a common word: Thank you Ron! A very big thank you for making me smile and for allowing free marketing costs on Edible Arrangements!

Ron just sent me a bigger package of fudge last night. He does make a lot of effort in making me smile. I can’t be more thankful for such a beautiful friend and a great heart full of kindness. The one thing he masters very well indeed is giving. I really don’t know how I could be more grateful for his friendship, despite the added calories and more occasional guilt trips I have to deal with by myself (I must admit though, he goes through a hard time listening to my weight complaints).

 
Thank you Ron, for everything you have done and for your friendship. I am blessed.